So, Microsoft has announced they will begin opening retail stores this fall. I actually laughed out loud when I heard the next part–they will put some of them right next to Apple retail stores. Why? Isn’t that like showing how bad you are and giving people the ability to A/B the products? Wouldn’t you rather locate your stores far away from Apple, so customers will forget how bad your products suck before getting to the Macs?

The analogy that came to mind right away was that it was like putting a junkyard next to a Mercedes dealership.

Apple must have been hoping for this. As a matter of fact, I’m sure that Apple would buy retail space near its stores and give it to Microsoft if they promised to open a store there.

Seriously, this is hardly a fair fight. On one side you have world class Apple designers working on its stores, which have turned out to be a phenomenal success in a market where retail shouldn’t be successful. On the other side, you have Microsoft with deep pockets to keep bad products on the market.

This isn’t the first time Microsoft has taken on Apple with a “killer” product. Just look at the Zune, that not-so-popular MP3 player that the world has basically forgotten about.

Of course there is Windows, the idea of which was stolen from Apple in the first place. If you don’t like Windows, you can always use DOS–that one is all Microsoft. And why shouldn’t you use Windows–you can catch a few viruses and some malware, so your computer can slow to a crawl and never work right again.

That sounds promising.

I’d love to see a shootout between a Mac Genius and a Windows… what will Microsoft call them? Live-in caretakers, maybe.

Ask the caretaker and genius to do simple things on their respective systems and see how easy–or difficult–it is. Then ask them questions on troubleshooting application installs, driver problems and connecting peripherals.

I’m assuming at this point they would just let the genius go for lunch since we don’t have those problems.

Microsoft is not going to get anywhere by putting its junkyard anywhere near Apple’s Mercedes dealership. If you want to compete with Apple, be innovative and create awesome products.

All you’re showing the world right now is that Apple was right.